Tuesday, 19 February 2013

My Personal Satellite

Zac Manchester a US student of Cornell University is developing 30cm long satellite which will contain nearly 200 smaller satellites about the size of a postage stamp. These can be used by & as individual personal satellites.

Now this could lead to a barrage of new uses & innovative instruments. Also banking might be affected in a big way. It’s a serious issue & hence I proceeded to discuss with my Zonal Manager or ZM nicknamed The Baldy. The nickname The Baldy is self explanatory & need not be referred to google search.

Though our Zonal Office is well equipped with latest gadgets & computers but The Baldy sparsely uses these. Once in a while he likes to see old Hindi films starring Mumtaz on his desktop.

While presenting him a cutting of this news I said:

-Sir this new personal satellite may be very useful item for you. Communication shall be clear & 24*7 with live news & photos etc. This satellite will continue to work uninterrupted if ever you decide to go to Moon or Mars & settle there after retirement sir. So many possibilities & opportunities are there for after retirement business sir.


-Should I book one for you sir? Only $ 399/- sir & it is well within your vested expenditure power.


-I suggest sir officer union elected Netas may also be provided with personal satellites so that communications are easier & management relations remain cordial. It will keep them in good humour & they will be raising lesser demands for other officers. They have a long wish-list of transfers & promotions of their Chamchas, revocation of certain suspensions as well as of getting certain other officers suspended. You are well aware of this sir.  So you shall have an upper hand in meetings with them sir. Of course they shall be eligible for smaller one of lesser capacity costing $ 299/-. And some concession will be available if we go for bulk booking. 

Then he wrote OK on the file & threw it back to me. The Baldy lowered his spec’s, cleared his throat & ordered:

-Hmm. Don’t you inform my wife.

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