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Thursday 28 February 2013

Coming up soon Sheela-Munee Bank

An urgent meeting of all key kitti members was requisitioned by chairperson Ms. Bhat in view of the announcement of setting up of ladies bank as per budget 2013-14. Several questions were to be resolved before this ladies bank was launched in terms of declaration in the budget today.
Ms. Mehra immediately called for the caterer & hurriedly settled the menu – samosa, sandwitch, assorted pakora including paneer pakora, rasmalai, canned juice & of course tea / coffee in the end. Then she called for bouquet, pads & pencils & instructed the peon for such & such. Suddenly she got very busy indeed. Meeting was stormy but cordial.
Minutes of the meeting are as under:
1. Chairperson addressed the gathering & apprised everybody of the news. Most of them were surprised as they did not have time for watching such a boring thing as budget on tv. But now they were excited. They were requested to consider & recommend a suitable name for this upcoming bank.
-Let’s call it Dhanno Bank. -Why not Saas-Bahu Bank?
Well there was shouting, giggles & amidst the din several names were heard: Bank of Chhamiyas’, Rani Bank, Bank of Girl Friends, Bank of Kanyakumari, Roopwati Bank, Lipsticky Bank etc. After a noisy session the name Sheela-Munni Bank was voted as favourite of all. This was done after abbreviating Sheela ki jawani & Munni badnam hui hit songs. There was live presentation also by members present of both the songs.
2. Then it was unanimously decided to designate savings a/c of senior citizens as Saas Accounts bearing 1% more interest. This item took much less time than was anticipated.
3. It was also unanimously decided that nomination in Saas Account would never be that of a Bahu but vice versa shall be accepted.
4. As proposed by a kitti member & accepted by majority, every branch must have a crèche & a beauty parlour attached.
5. No male guards were to be engaged but fit young ladies well versed in judo, karate, taekwondo, kushti & boxing were to be deployed at the branches.
6. Unanimously decided that GOI, MOF & RBI be requested to consider printing currency notes depicting female(s) from ancient history, saints, celebrities’ etc. Distribution of this may be through proposed Sheela-Munni Bank only.

7. Recruiting agencies must have 51% females having adequate experience of being mother-in-law.
8. All loans & advances must be made to female entrepreneurs, lady workers, lady shop keepers etc. However, males running their businesses for ladies like, ladies tailors, fashion designers, sandal-chappal vendors, chefs & cooks shall also be entertained for financing on merits.
9. In due course Sheela-Munni Bank may finance ladies buses, ladies metros & ladies space shuttles in near future.
10. Meeting ended with vote of thanks to the Chairperson.                                                                                                

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