Tuesday, 7 May 2013

Making Noise!

About 130 employees were working in the Jhumri Talieyya branch of which 40 were ladies & 20 officers of various grades to run the show. The branch was headed by a Chief saab & to test his patience & skills of management there was a unit secretary Com Singh representing workmen, workwomen & non union members.

Com Singh ran a parallel branch govt with the help of handpicked office bearers. Whereas the Chief saab had practically nil choice in selecting his officers, Com Singh had chosen his lieutenants carefully.

He himself was smart, well dressed, well equipped with rules & regulations, HO circulars, extensive network of contacts, inside information of transfers, charge sheets & suspensions etc. One thing he lacked was sober language for he extensively used ‘iski bhen ki’ etc due to which the women folk detested him. But this language came in handy whenever he had to settle score with an officer or for intimidating opponents.

-May I introduce other office bearers to you? Yes? Okokok!

Com Dhoti-Kurta Misra hailed from Jhumri itself & throughout the year remained clad in dhoti & kurta. He loved to have perfumed gilloree of paan & was normally averse to talking but preferred to nod or used sign language. His teeth were brick red. Due to this habit he kept a bucket full of waste paper as spittoon & entire dak section smelled of peculiar perfume. He kept updating Com Singh about important letters coming in & those going out.

Com Loudspeaker Ramesh had a bulging figure & booming voice. He preferred jeans & broad belts which stopped his stomach coming out & spilling on the floor! He worked in loans & had good liaison with CC parties & could organise discounts on their products. His job was to keep Com Singh abreast of new loan proposals units etc. Also he could shout slogans very well in the rallies & demonstrations. His intention was to keep on right side of Com Singh & on left side of Chief saab so that he remained glued to loans section.

Com Casanova Suresh was handsome fellow fond of singing & music. He had been taken in the cabinet to gain access to ladies staff as Com Singh was unable to do so himself. He easily got into ladies groups to sort out their problems. His job was to advise them of union activities & try to improve upon image of Com Singh. In union assemblies he was the star entertainer.

Com Driver Gopichand had been inducted in the cabinet as there had to be a sub-staff as well. He was helpful in letting Com Singh know about the movements of Chief saab.

Com Silent-lady Sunita was titular head of ladies staff & obeyed whatever was told by Com Singh. She believed – ‘they who remain silent also serve God’.

Com Shaniture was best of them in modelling. On Saturdays he wore all black outfit - black scarf, black kurta & black pyjama. Rudraksh beads garlands, unshaven chin, oily hair pulled back & Jhola on his shoulder. Ladies were especially averse to him & tried to keep kms away.  Working as cashier, he had become hardcore fan of Com Singh. He enjoyed making noise & shouting at the instance of Com Singh. He used to accompany & carry briefcase of Com Singh. In one enquiry Com Singh was defending an employee & during enquiry in pre planned manner, Com Singh called Com Shaniture as witness. As soon as Com Shaniture entered the enquiry cabin, he ran away with briefcase of Enquiry Officer! A noisy scene ensued! Needless to add that enquiry was concluded to the satisfaction of Com Singh.

In his Jhola, Com Shaniture kept a printed yellow receipt book for donation to jagran. Throughout the year he collected donations though everybody suspected him of using donation for addiction of some sorts. Nobody had attended any of his jagrans. He approached ladies with yellow receipt book & who would generally throw a fiver or tenner scornfully & fearfully to get rid of him. This suited him well as they never asked about where & when of jagran. He was known to fleece customers as well discreetly.

He used to play another trick for creating fear in new comers. He kept a long stick with a handle. He will go to the new comer, show him the stick, twist the handle & from the stick pull out a thin double edged two feet long sword ‘gupti’. He would then whisper ‘Guptaji, keep this gupti & don’t tell anybody, I would collect back in the evening. This place is infested with criminals & one must keep it handy. Don’t you worry mai hoo na.’ And in the evening he would come back with yellow receipt book!

What do you say Chief saab also donated?  
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