Saturday, 30 March 2013

Training Chief

Our Zonal Manager called our Training Chief for a meeting. There was a batch of 20 new recruits joining the bank who needed to be trained in branch banking.

Sitting across the table the duo exchanged greetings & stared at each other. Good that there was a large table in between them in the chamber else duo could have a duel.

Now our ZM is 55 plus, short & pot bellied with a few hair left on his bald head. That’s why he is affectionately called The Baldy. On the other hand our Training Chief is 45 plus , tall & with lots of hair falling all over his forehead & shoulders. Because of the job of being trainer his nick name is Guru. You may further rename if you like it as Guruji or Gurudevji or Gurughantalji. The Baldy prefers the last one.

The Baldy places great emphasis on training. He makes it a point to address the trainees in the inaugural as well as concluding sessions & enlightens them on the policies, goals & objectives of our bank. So went the instructions to Gurughantalji :

-Don’t allow any trainee to join late or leave early.
-Don’t permit any leave during training.
-Don’t allow them to sleep in post-lunch session.
-Don’t allow them to talk in the class.
-I will come in the concluding session & talk to them. I would like to hand over the posting orders to trainees personally for their next assignments. Please organise properly.

Fully charged, Gurughantalji immediately proceeded to organise the training classes. Lectures, demos, on-site training, off-site training, hands-on, hands-off, inside faculty, outside faculty all proceeded on terrific pace. Prior to conclusion, review & feedback sessions were held. All was going well. Only one or two of the trainees seemed disgruntled. This was normal feature of any batch of new comers.

The Baldy was in class room for conclusion. After usual sermons on policy, goals etc he wanted one or two questions to be answered by the trainees.

-Wot is the difference between Loans & Advances?

-Sir Loans are given to gents & Advances are made towards women folk!

The Baldy & Gurughantalji glared at each other. Face of The Baldy went red. The face of Gurughantalji went white. The Baldy posed another question to the trainees.

-Wot is a Term Loan?

-It is a Term Loan if terms between borrower & manager have been settled while granting the loan.

The Baldy & Gurughantalji glared at each other. Face of The Baldy went red. The face of Gurughantalji went white. The Baldy called for an envelope marked Jhumri Taliyya . He opened it up changed the name of trainee to Training Chief  & declared:

-Pack up your luggage Training Chief. You are going to Jhumri Taliyya.
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